Friday, October 25, 2013

I, Me, Myself!

WARNING:  This is not a come back post or a post saying How much I miss this place. I am not suffering from writer's block as everything is in my head but I just can't put it down. This was written quite sometime back; its an incomplete post but I guess the words wanted to feel there presence in this web world.

The words in the image individually don't stand strong unless they are bonded together in a sentence. Same is with life.

Are you happy? Are you content and satisfied in life? Hmm...
The answer to these questions can't be "I don't know".

The great minds say,'You should be satisfied and content with your life' or is it' Life must be about contentment and satisfaction'??? Are both one and the same?

What I feel is there is always 'but' even if the answer to the questions is a 'Yes', there's that bit of unsatisfied feeling, 'tiny little bit' that remains. Ohhh Yes! I am selfish. I Love Myself. Don't You love yourself?

Self Love is the soul of living.Of course there is a thin line between self love and selfishness that can hurt others.

This post is not a vent but is about the unanswered questions in my ever babbling mind. It cropped up after reading thought provoking writings by few of you, my fellow bloggers.

And a part of this post would be the reply to the comments on my previous post.

"There comes a time when the past memories becomes the present regrets
And you realize that the beautiful past was not that beautiful after all..." written by Beyond. I was never familiar with the regret feeling. But as time went by, it started to haunt me. (side effects of growing up I guess) It throttles me,suffocates me. KILLS me without actual killing and that what hurts a lot...A LOT!!! Photos!Journal! The passports to the old memories. I tore them, deleted them. But do they actually get erased? Even with the 10 % brain that functions don't allow me to FORGET those memories.

Till Eternity...By Serendipity  Its such a tender feeling that comes up after reading this. With all the odds and the thoughts that differ you from the other person and still being together by the end of each day, is what I will say being in Love. 

What if compromise start becoming synonym for adjustment? How far can you change for others to survive in the relations? If I don't recognize the reflection staring back at me when I look in the mirror, then I have lost myself. 

I do believe in Karma. "कर्म किये जा, फल की इच्छा मत कर" But what if I deserve that fruit and don't get it? And if I do,what if its too late?If I am standing near my grave? Can then I say "Yes!!! I was/am satisfied with life"? Sometimes I feel the Kalyug version of the saying about 'Karma' might be true..."Karma is a..." ! I am lazy to press shift and asterisk sign for the word. I know you got that!!!

No! I am not disoriented. Confused! might be. But not at all disoriented. I know where I am, what I am doing with my life. The way I am leading life is the consequence of my thinking. Questions are all we have...Eon Heath. And see, I have put up many of them in this post too.

"aaja tujhko pukaare teri parchaayiyaa" *sigh* Such a beautiful line from the lyrics! There is a scene in the movie where Deepika Padukone asks Ranbir Kapoor to dip his legs in the pool. The water being shivering cold he withdraws his legs. She then says, 'thodi der, baadmein mein theek lagne lagega' Same with life, right? We become so used to few things that we stop realizing how much it had hurt earlier.

P.S. Wanted to write more but I shall stop here.

Monday, April 8, 2013


Have you ever experienced the charm that music does when you are feeling all alone? Your hearts joy synchronizing with every beat of the soothing music. An intense emotion flowing through the music and the words which you can relate to. Calming your senses like first rain drops on thirsty land.

Music!Its not a thread for the fear of being broken or a knot that can be loosen. For me it is a feeling that strives within. No one can break or kill it.

How many times have you caught yourself staring nowhere? Not day dreaming but thinking amidst the moving fast life around; about the ‘Quest of Life’?

A social animal. But why sometimes the societal norms prick? You are no one in the crowd, but you are ‘the one’ who have been blessed with “Life”.

Far behind I had left a path
Turning around I wondered ‘have I lost a lot?’
Traces of that long forgotten road
Retrieving its memories
I stand questioning “should I….?”
“Why not?”
Along with words and music
Taking this long forgotten road again…